Kara’s Collection: Enjoying Today...Kind of

From an article originally posted November 20, 2012…

With Thanksgiving a few days away, I think of one person, my grandma.

I remember Thanksgiving morning waking to the smell of the turkey in the oven, and I knew it wouldn’t be long before Grandma and Grandpa would arrive. They were the kind of guests that required backing into your driveway because they were so loaded down with food. We hosted, we made the bird, but grandma did most of the cooking. Today I was chopping the celery, remembering how Grandma brought all the stuffing fixings all chopped and ready for us to assemble together. From the youngest age, I bellied up to the kitchen to help Mom and Grandma.

There is a cloud hanging over Thanksgiving this year. I have my final chemo treatment next week. The last treatment left me more than anxious to face my last round. My heart is struggling to remain in the present and enjoy today. We have plans that make my heart happy. We have a menu I can’t wait to sample. We will be with friends we love like family. I’m even trying out a new Martha Stewart recipe, but I can’t shake my fear of next week.

Remembering Grandma, I remember her hard work, her yummy food, but most of all her loving, cheerful spirit. A room with my grandma in it was a room with love. She worked hard, cooked well, loved her salt, enjoyed a strawberry Bartles and James, and she took time to make me feel important and loved. My siblings and I have been talking about her a lot lately. She is a gift to all who know her. I know if she were able, she would be here having tea parties with the girls and playing cops and robbers with Lake. She would tell me I didn’t chop my celery small enough and she would talk me into putting eggs in my stuffing. She would let me eat all the cherries out of the fruit salad, and she would tell me it was all going to be okay. She would cry hard at seeing me bald, then she would find a way back to laughter.

Lord, give me the grace to enjoy today. Help me experience joy in the midst of chemo. Give me the strength needed to show up next Wednesday, when all I really want to do is move to Australia. Any takers?

I love you grandma! Thank you for a lifetime of wonderful memories.